SEIZE THY POWER

Hebrew – לתפוס את כוחך Greek – άρπαξε τη δύναμή σου Arabic – الاستيلاء على قوتك Latin – carpe potentiam tuam I was able to take my compassion and revert stubbornness Courage is to have fear and do it anyway. Emotional – emotional mind – Logical – reasonable mind – 4816 YONAKA – Seize the…

In Retrospect

not sure where to begin…

… but i remember the moment everything changed. the memories are coming and going… some here to stay and others willing to hide from the obvious mind. I’ve been told that I am strong. from a young age, i have had to hide a lot of myself in order to survive. emotions run deep and…

In Retrospect

borderline between emotional & logical realities

chapter one let’s start in the middle. sometimes, when the wind blows it destroys. i’ve found the pain that simmers in my gut. the fear of waking at 2:00 am and not being able to save myself… or him again. death in sleep is expected. but let’s be logical, shall we? my reality is bleak.…

In Retrospect

borderline between what & what?

black and white. realities – emotional – virtual – logical. i am in purgatory. https://youtu.be/mfM-DYz95ZU https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/body/health/a30327/living-with-borderline-personality-disorder/ “Having the diagnosis was such a relief – it confirmed for me why from such a young age I have reacted, felt and thought the way I do.” The worst parts of BPD for her are “dealing with rejection…

In Retrospect

I was thinking about…

the way life doesn’t change unless I am in the drivers seat. Oceanic Inspiration Winding veils round their heads, the women walked on deck. They were now moving steadily down the river, passing the dark shapes of ships at anchor, and London was a swarm of lights with a pale yellow canopy drooping above it.…

In Retrospect

dear dad

dear dad, its been a while. do you feel me? the pain that i live? doesn’t it hurt you like it hurts me? wish you could have reached the nirvana you seek. mistakes, addictions, disorders and labels aside… i miss you. i would give almost anything to be with you. i never said goodbye. i…

In Retrospect

flustered

flustered today doesn’t seem fair. life isn’t. shouldn’t expect to be on it everyday. today i am all over the place. simple mistakes chock me like a nouse would. i am tired of feeling lost. i wish that everything would make sense inside my mind. its troublesome and tiring being lost all the time. i…

In Retrospect

issues

issues lyrics I’m jealousI’m overzealousWhen I’m downI get real downWhen I’m high, I don’t come downI get angryBaby, believe meI could love you just like thatAnd I could leave you just this fast But you don’tJudge me‘Cause if you did, babyI would judge you tooNo, you don’t judge me‘Cause if you did, babyI would judge…

In Retrospect

artemis

artemis underground is life changing for me. the song represents not only my pain, but the calm in between. since having to search for my selfworth is harder than anything i have done in my life – between twight brings reassurance that everything will work out. the sadness is still lingering however there is a…

In Retrospect